GATORS CAN LOSE?!?

#11 Auburn 27, #2 Florida 17

We lost? To Auburn?!? More importantly, what the heck is an “Auburn?” The result of this game came as a great shock to me, as the Gators hadn’t ever lost a game in my lifetime. Quite frankly, I didn’t even think they were capable of losing (especially to a school named after a color; is “Turquoise Tech” on the schedule next year?) Still, I suppose you have to feel sorry for that school after the tragedy it suffered last week. You see, the library burned down, destroying all 10 of the university’s books. Even worse, half of them hadn’t been colored in yet!

In between feedings and naps, I could tell that my Gators were kicking butt in the first half. Sadly, it seems that during halftime the other team was able to switch our quarterback with a little girl. Fumble, interception, fumble…and that was just the 4th quarter! I was so upset, I pooped myself (repeatedly!) Sure, the refs blew a big call, but we Gators don’t make excuses. Besides, we get a week off to rest up and take our frustrations out on Georgia. Daddy says that when it comes to rivalries, Auburn is like the guy who cut you off in traffic, but Georgia is the ex-wife who cut you off in traffic while driving her new husband’s Ferrari on her way to the bank to cash your alimony check. Clearly, daddy hates Georgia (and is off his meds.)